Barbara's Banter

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

We cannot come to Christ apart from God’s grace because we can’t save ourselves. If we could, we would not need a Savior. The gospel of Christ is all about grace.

Here’s the deal: We are saved by grace. (Ephesians 2:5-7) This grace is a gift from God. (Ephesians 2:8) Forgiveness, redemption, and salvation come from this grace. (Ephesians 1:7) Jesus is full of grace and has given His grace to us. (John 1:14-16) While we were sinners, Christ extended this gift to us by dying for our sins. (Romans 5:6-8) Therefore, it is definitely something we did not earn or deserve.

God loves us! In fact, there is nothing we can do to make Him love us more, and there is nothing we can do that would make Him love us less. God’s grace is with us on our good days and on our bad days. One would think this concept would be liberating, but for centuries it has seemed to confuse Christians.

Most early Christians came out of a Jewish background, strongly rooted in works and traditions. They were familiar with the Law of Moses, but grace posed a problem. They were used to trying to earn a place in God’s kingdom by offering sacrifices, eating certain foods, and keeping certain rituals. And they were intent on having Gentile converts adhere to these Jewish traditions, too.

Paul warned the early church against abandoning grace for legalistic doctrines. (Galatians 1:5) Paul encouraged living by grace rather than by works. He exhorted all believers to seek to know Christ through a personal relationship with Him.

Legalism has a certain appeal because we get all the credit. We keep the law. We do it. With grace, God gets all the credit. He forgives. He pardons. He extends His hand to us. He gives us salvation. We don’t earn it; He freely gives it.

Our relationship with God should be based on love, not works. Even the Old Covenant Ten Commandments weren’t really based on love. We can honor our parents without loving them. Not coveting our neighbor’s stuff is not the same as loving our neighbor. Not having graven images or other gods before God is not the same as loving Him. Some might say, “But aren’t these ways of showing love?” Perhaps – but only if the motive stems from love. The New Covenant is all about loving God and our neighbors.

The same law versus grace struggle exists today. People are still trying to earn their way into heaven. They strive to stay close to God by performing certain religious deeds or rituals. Such practices are not necessarily wrong, but even David understood that God didn’t want sacrifices and offerings as much as a heart for Him. (Psalms 51:15-17)

Humans have a tendency to go to extremes. In the matter of grace, they either want to have a list of do’s and don’ts – still trying to earn salvation – or they think since salvation is guaranteed through grace, what they do doesn’t matter.

Does the fact that God has extended us grace and forgiven our sins mean He no longer cares about what we do? No, it doesn’t! Romans 6:1-2 makes that abundantly clear. God did not call us to live an unholy life. (1 Thessalonians 4:7) So living in grace doesn’t mean we just do what we want. This grace should bring forth good fruit in our lives through the relationship we experience with God. (Colossians 1:5-6)

God does not want to guilt us into a relationship with Him. He doesn’t want us to worship, pray, study, and meditate because we feel guilty. He wants us to do it because we love Him and appreciate His gift of grace. The law could not save us (works), so Jesus did what the law could not do. (Romans 8:1-6)

Consider this… God’s grace is always with us. Romans 5:1-2 tells us we stand in God’s grace. In other words, it is with us in our daily walk with him. Living by grace means to be totally dependent on God. God’s grace is our sufficiency. (2 Corinthians 3:5-6)

One final thought… 

Grace is not something we do; it is something only God can do for us.

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

Most of us like to be in control. We would like to have more self-control and, if we’re totally honest, we’d like to control others and every situation. In our desire for control, we sometimes leave God out of the picture. God is the One we should want to be in control. Yet most of us prefer to manipulate others into doing what we think is best. Unfortunately, what we think is best for others and what God thinks is best may be totally different.

There is nothing wrong with helping people when appropriate. We don’t want to turn a blind eye to suffering or develop a “go and be filled” attitude when we haven’t given a needed drink of water or crust of bread. (James 1:16) The Bible encourages us to be concerned about the poor, the elderly, the fatherless, the widowed, and those less fortunate. But there is a difference between helping those who can’t help themselves and helping those who refuse to help themselves or make changes that would enable them to lead better lives.

We must determine when needs are legitimate. It’s one thing to give a starving person a meal, it’s quite another to continually loan money to a spendthrift or gambler, get a drug user/seller out of jail, or let a deadbeat relative crash on your couch for a year or more. Yes, I know people are weak and can appear helpless, but sometimes our desire to help others causes us to intervene when perhaps we shouldn’t. It’s natural to want to alleviate another’s dire circumstances, but in doing so, we may be circumventing the work God is doing in a person’s life.

God uses difficulties to draw people closer to Him and teach principles such as “what you sow, you reap.” (Galatians 6:7) When we step in and continually rescue people, we may be blocking them from receiving certain blessings from God and learning life lessons needed for physical, emotional, and spiritual maturity.

God sets an example for us. We all know we are pardoned from all our sins (past, present, future) – the deliberate and accidental ones. And while it’s true God has taken away the ultimate penalty for sin (death), God does not always take away the residual consequences. In fact, He rarely takes away the consequences for our actions. God loves us unconditionally, but He usually allows a circumstance to take its course. If He didn’t, we would never learn any life lessons.

Consider this… In our zeal to help others, could we sometimes circumvent the lessons God has built into a system so people will not habitually repeat the same mistakes? There is a difference in forgiving someone and continually bailing them out of situations. God always forgives; He doesn’t always bail out.

Do we really believe God can take care of a situation or do we feel He always needs our help? We need to let God be in control. God can do it. We don’t have to have all the answers, we don’t always have to intervene, and we don’t need to react or immediately try to fix every situation. Maybe we can help more by listening, smiling, encouraging, and pointing them to God instead of getting sucked into their situation. When we are the ones doing it all, we are usually very proud of ourselves. Even if we give God the credit, a little part of us says, “WOW! Look how God used me in that situation.”

If we prayerfully turn our concerns over to God, He can do things we cannot. God can solve problems better than us and God knows what’s best for each person. Perhaps we should learn to trust God more than we trust ourselves.

One final thought…

Sometimes we need to just get out of the way and let God do His thing.

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

Theologian A. W. Tozer said: “Much of our difficulty as seeking Christians stems from our unwillingness to take God as He is and adjust our lives accordingly. We insist upon trying to modify Him and to bring Him nearer to our own image.”

Academically we want to be made into God’s image (Genesis 1:26); emotionally we want to make God over into our image, so we tend to give Him a spiritual “face lift” – a nip here and a tuck there, so He can be a reflection of us instead of us reflecting Him.

Subconsciously, we think God tends to reflect our own personalities which can influence the choices we make. Introverts might think God is distant and not all that interested in our day-to-day lives, so they withdraw from interaction with others. Extroverts might think God is the life of the party, so they live it up. Happy people might think God wants to give everyone a big hug, so they smile, smile, smile. Angry people might think God wants to annihilate everyone, so they stay grumpy. Activists might think God is interested in social change, so they run for office. Pacifists might think God will just let everything take its course, so they remain uninvolved.

To carry it a step further, many of us think God likes what we like and hates what we hate. If we are vegetarians, God visits the salad bar. If we sing country music, God wears a Stetson and strums a guitar. If we are rich, God lives in a mansion. If we are poor, God lives in a shack.

We even think God judges a matter the way we would judge. We think His views are our views. Of course this makes life so much easier because the phrase “what would Jesus do” (WWJD) quickly morphs into “what I want to do.” Actually, there’s nothing wrong with having preferences or opinions as long as we don’t think they are the standard for righteousness.

It may be hard to acknowledge that what we feel is not as important as what God feels. What we think is not as important as what God thinks. Our thoughts are not God’s thoughts. (Isaiah 55:8) Our views are not necessarily God’s views, and almost assuredly our preferences are not the same as His. This may come as a shock, but God does not like what we like just because we like it. God does not hate what we hate just because we hate it. God does not react how we react just so we can justify what we do. If He did, we would not need to seek the mind of Christ (Philippians 2:5) and be transformed (Romans 12:2). Therefore, we should strive to align our thinking with God’s, not His to ours.

Consider this… God is God and we are not. We should be trying to become more like God instead of imagining Him more like us.

One final thought…

We are not God even though we might think and act like we are!

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

A few years ago an acquaintance with a bothersome back problem was lamenting to me that God had not healed her.  She wondered why.  Then she named off those in the Bible God had healed and a few others she knew first hand.  After all, she was a Christian who prayed for others.  Why had God not taken away her pain after she had consistently beseeched him to do so?

There were a couple of things I tried to gently point out to her. First, it’s not wise to compare our situation to another’s, since God works with each of us on an individual basis. Secondly, perhaps God does not exist to take away our pain.  Healing is something God performs for His glory not our comfort.  This was a totally foreign concept for her so she said, “I’ll have to think about that.”

Indeed, God is capable of easing our pain, but He doesn’t always touch us with a magic wand where it hurts to make it better – like kissing a “boo-boo.”  Although, He might sprinkle a little fairy dust of stamina, endurance, encouragement, perseverance, or peace of mind to help us make it through the hard times.

Living in a “quick-fix” society, we would all prefer God to instantly, magically fix our circumstances.  But God is not always in the “quick-fix” business. Sometimes He offers pieces of solutions – bit by bit.  Maybe He will plant a seed coming from something we might read, a phrase we might hear, the lyrics of a song we’re listening to, or something someone says off-handedly that starts us on the road to healing. We discover that perhaps God isn’t as concerned about our circumstances as our reaction to them or what we can learn from them.

Consider this… God is not our big sugar daddy in the sky waiting to grant our every request. True, He is omnipotent and has the power to give us everything we want, but He isn’t our personal Santa Claus anxious to fulfill everything on our wish list – even if we have been nice instead of naughty.  That would not be good for us and God is interested only in our good.

I often think of the following poem written by that famous author, Anonymous…

I asked for strength,
And God gave me difficulties to make me strong.

I asked for wisdom,
And God gave me problems to learn to solve.

I asked for prosperity,
And God gave me brain and brawn to work.

I asked for courage,
And God gave me dangers to overcome.

I asked for patience,
And God placed me in situations where I was forced to wait.

                                              I asked for love,                                                                             And God gave me troubled people to help.

One final thought…

God promised to supply our needs, not our wants.

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

Believe it or not, the ultimate goal of prayer is not to get God to give us everything we want. “Give me, give me, give me” prayers miss the mark. If that’s the only prayer we offer God, our prayer life will become ineffective. Prayer is a way of entering into a relationship with God.

Therefore, prayer can have many components: praise (1 Chronicles 29:10-13), adoration (Ephesians 3:14-21), thanksgiving (Ephesians 5:20), supplication (Matthew 7:7, Philippians 4:6), confession (Proverbs 28:13, 1 John 1:9), and so on. There are many ways to approach prayer.

If anyone should have known how to pray, it should have been the disciples. Yet one of them asked Jesus to “teach us to pray.” (Luke 11:1) He wasn’t just asking for himself, but for all of them – teach “us.” Maybe these disciples knew how to pray but they were aware that there was more to it, so they were asking for further instructions, deeper relationship, and more understanding – perhaps a different way of looking at prayer. We can ask God the same question. Lord, teach us more about this wonderful, direct access we have with you.

Why? So we can get what we want? I think not!

Lord teach us to pray…

• so we can stay attuned to Your presence.
• so we stay focused on You.
• so we can realize all blessings come from You.
• so we can love You with our whole hearts.
• so we can love our brothers and sisters in Christ.
• so we can love our neighbors.
• so we can appreciate the beauty of Your creation.
• so we can forgive those who have wronged us.
• so we will not be hypocrites.
• so we can be an instrument of Your peace.
• so we will trust You more and more.
• so we can participate in Your plan rather than have our own agenda.
• so we can promote unity in the church.
• so we can exercise Your wisdom.
• so we can be less critical and more understanding.
• so we can esteem others better than ourselves.
• so we speak only Your truth in love.
• so our actions glorify You.
• so we can have compassion on the hurting and suffering around us.
• so we can be a reflection of Your love.
• so we can glorify You.
• so we can align our will to Yours.

We were created to be in a relationship with God. Prayer is part of that process. A deep, meaningful relationship cannot form unless we have a means of constant contact. Prayer is our avenue of developing that relationship. It provides continual dialogue with God.

Consider this… Perhaps our prayers would get more results if we didn’t approach them with the attitude of “I wonder what God can do for me today?” Maybe asking God what we can do to better serve Him each day would make all our prayers more effective.

One final thought…

“Prayer is putting oneself in the hands of God, at His disposition, and listening to His voice in the depth of our hearts.” ~Mother Teresa

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

Many times we ask people for advice but we really do not want their input. What we really want is their stamp of approval on what we have already decided to do. Unfortunately, we can approach our spiritual life the same way. Many prayers are not seeking God’s guidance in our lives, but an attempt to talk God into giving us what we want.

The purpose of prayer is not to get what we want. The purpose is to develop a relationship with God. This relationship changes our way of thinking. We no longer look at prayer as a means to change our circumstances as much as it is a way to change ourselves. That’s heavy stuff! Prayer, coupled with Bible study, helps us form a deeper relationship with God. It is an avenue for His thoughts to become our thoughts. Our ultimate goal is to align our will to God’s, not the other way around.

While it is true that God hears all prayers, if the only time we pray is when we are at the end of our rope expecting God to immediately deliver us from our circumstances, we are being unreasonable. Prayer doesn’t change circumstances as much as it changes our way of thinking, so we can cope with our circumstances. Many of us are secretly thinking “let my will be done” when we should be praying “Thy will be done.” (Matthew 6:10) God is not as concerned about granting our every request as He is that through prayer we might come to discern His mind and become ONE with Him. (John 17:21, 22)

Our prayer goal should be to align our will with God’s, not the other way around. Christ realized this when He prayed for “this cup to pass from me” regarding His crucifixion. That would have been His preference. However, ultimately He wanted God’s will to be done. (Matthew 26:39)

We all go through hard times. These experiences will either make us bitter or better. We will either become cynical or nobler, small minded or understanding, selfish or giving, negative or positive, self-centered or God-centered. Prayer is what enables us to be sorrowful yet always rejoicing, financially poor but rich in the fruits of God’s Holy Spirit, having very little but possessing everything. (2 Corinthians 6:10)

Consider this… Prayer and being close to God is why Habakkuk could say that even though his crops failed and his cattle died, he would still rejoice in the Lord. (Habakkuk 3:17-18) It’s why Job could say that even if God killed him, he would still trust in God. (Job 13:15) It’s why Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego declared they knew God could deliver them, but even if God chose not to deliver them, they still weren’t going to bow down to some golden idol. (Daniel 3:16-18)

Saying prayer changes things is not as close to the truth as prayer changes the way we look at things. We can see the spiritual depth behind physical, mental, and emotional challenges.

When we truly trust God and turn our lives over to Him, we surrender our will to His. We want Him to guide us because we know He has our best interests at heart. Only God knows how we can best glorify Him. We want God’s will to be done in our lives and the lives of those we pray for. After all, we should want what is truly best for them, not what we think is best. That’s why we want to align our will to God’s.

One final thought…

“Don’t give God instructions, just report for duty!” ~Corrie ten Boom

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

A few years ago, I was conversing with a man about some “special” understanding he had reached while doing Biblical research. Actually, I use the word “conversing” loosely, since it takes two people to have a conversation and this guy definitely was not interested in anything I had to say.  It was somewhat interesting, but the pontification went on for a long time. I tuned out somewhere between the genealogies, archeological findings, and where everyone had it all wrong but him.

Finally, when he took a breath, I said, “That’s interesting. How do you feel all these findings have enhanced your walk with Jesus Christ?”

I expected him to expound on proving the Bible true or God’s existence or something somewhat significant. Instead he just looked perplexed and almost speechless for a moment. Then he replied, “I don’t think it has.”

“That’s too bad,” I said. “What good is all this knowledge if it doesn’t draw you closer to God?” A statement he could not seem to comprehend.

As he started to spout a few more facts and data, I excused myself. My “polite-listening” gene had reached its limit. Let him bore someone else with his “special” understanding. What good is this kind of knowledge if it doesn’t enhance one’s relationship with Jesus Christ?

Biblical knowledge is not synonymous with wisdom or spiritual maturity. Knowledge is merely information. If not used to edify the body of Christ, it can just “puff” us up – not build us up. And it can be incredibly boring! That “I know more than you do” officiousness will not win souls for Christ. 1 Corinthians 8:1 says that knowledge may make us feel important, but love builds up the church. The purpose of Biblical knowledge and scriptures should be to point us to Jesus Christ. (John 5:39, 40)

We study the Bible not so much to know about God, but rather to know God and grow in an intimate relationship with Him. Knowing about archeological findings might be interesting, but knowing how Jesus handled certain situations can teach us how to live. How did He treat people? How was His relationship with God manifested? Sometimes we build whole doctrines around one or two scriptures we do not fully understand and totally ignore the hundreds of scriptures focusing on believing in God, praising God, loving God, and loving one another.

Bible study is essential for Christian growth. Using other reference sources to elevate that study is commendable. No one loves a trivia tidbit better than I do. It can stimulate us mentally and cause us to dig deeper into the Scriptures. But let’s never forget that God is not looking for “head” knowledge as much as He is for “heart” knowledge.

Consider this… We are to love God with all our “heart,” not all our “head.”  Using what we learn to draw closer to God, enhance our relationship with Him, and be better representatives of Jesus Christ is how we can use our Biblical knowledge wisely.

One final thought…

It’s not how much you know, but how much you care that really counts!

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

Christ came so we might have life and have it more abundantly. (John 10:10) Some modern ministers lead us to believe this refers to wealth and prosperity, encouraging people to go boldly before God and claim this promised abundance. These “health and wealth” and/or “name it and claim it” preachers measure faith by how much God blesses us materially.

However, God is not the big “sugar daddy” in the sky, ready to give us everything we want. We may prayerfully sing, “Oh Lord won’t you buy me a Mercedes Benz” and we might get it, but that doesn’t mean God gave it to us. 

In fact, Jesus said that a man’s life does not consist of the abundance of the things he might possess. (Luke 12:15) If we seek first the kingdom of God,we won’t have to be overly concerned about such matters. (Matthew 6:31-33) If we humble ourselves before Him, He will exalt us when the time is right. (1 Peter 5:6-7)    

Now don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying an abundant life precludes riches or worldly success, but it does not depend on it either. Paul knew this better than anyone. He knew how to be abased or exalted, have a full tummy or an empty one, to abound or suffer – and through it all be content and give thanks. (Philippians 4:11-13; Ephesians 5:20) In other words, we can experience the abundant life even if we are dealing with family trials, poor as church mice, or at the bottom of the workforce food chain.

John 10:10 tells us the reason Jesus came was so we could have life (eternal life, everlasting life, life without fear of death). The phrase “more abundantly” is the Greek word “perissos” meaning “beyond, more, and above measure.” It refers back to the word “life.” Not only did Jesus come to give us eternal life, but even more than that, He lives His life within us right now. His very presence in us adds something immeasurable to our existence. He is what makes our life worth living in spite of how much money we have in the bank.

If we read the whole passage of John 10, we see it’s about Jesus being our shepherd, the sheep hearing His voice, and Jesus being our open door. The whole context refers to us having access to God. And that, my friend, is what the more abundant life is all about. Not only do we get eternal life, but as an added bonus we have the opportunity to build a relationship with Jesus Christ – the very One who makes it all possible.

Man views abundance in terms of physical possessions. God has a different perspective. His abundant life is filled with love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faith, gentleness, self-control, compassion, humility, character, wisdom, enthusiasm, dignity, optimism, confidence, honesty, and a relationship with Him. In other words, the more abundant life is full of all the things money can’t buy. No matter how much money we have, we cannot buy more patience, wisdom, hope, self-control, or salvation!

Consider this… Money cannot buy us a “more abundant” life, but God can give it to us if we let Him. The more we open our hearts to God, the more abundant our lives will be.

One final thought…

Abundance is not always about having more; sometimes it’s about having enough.

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

Paul told the Philippians that he had learned the secret of contentment. (Philippians 4:10-14) Paul used the word “learned” twice in this passage, which indicates that contentment did not come naturally. It was not some instant transformation. It was something he learned through his relationship with God.

Did you know Paul wrote these words while in prison, being denied every comfort? The Philippian church had sent him a financial gift and he wanted to express his thanks. However, he didn’t want to give the impression that God was not sufficient for his needs, so he used this situation to emphasize a life lesson on true contentment.

Paul rejoiced in their gift, not really because of the money (although it was nice and he definitely didn’t turn it down), but more so because it showed their heartfelt care and concern for him. (v. 10) However, Paul wanted the Philippians to know that true contentment looks beyond physical comforts to the peace that comes from being right with God. (v. 13) That’s why he could be content regardless of his circumstances. Nevertheless, he praised them for sharing in his distress. (v.14)

Some synonyms for contentment might be satisfaction, gratification, happiness, or fulfillment. But believe it or not, true contentment is not dependent on outer circumstances. Paul knew this. He knew how to be exalted and abased, have a full tummy or empty one, and abound or suffer – and through it all be content and give thanks. (Philippians 4:11-13; Ephesians 4:20)

Contentment is not based on power, money, physical beauty, or material possessions. If it were, all successful, wealthy, gorgeous people who surround themselves with everything money can buy would be happy and content. We know that’s not the case. Actor Jim Carrey once said, “I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it’s not the answer.”

What is the answer? What is this secret Paul talks about? God! True contentment is an inner sense of peace that comes from being right with God. Additionally, contentment comes from focusing on what we have, not on what we don’t have.

Have we learned the secret of being content? In today’s world, we receive thousands of messages daily trying to persuade us to buy things we do not need with money we do not have. It’s tempting, even though God tells us that a man’s life does not consist of the abundance of things he might possess. (Luke 12:15)

Consider this… Arsenius was a Roman imperial tutor in Egypt who withdrew from Egyptian secular society to lead a prayer-oriented, austere lifestyle in the desert. His contemporaries so admired him that they named him Arsenius the Great. He was considered one of the Desert Fathers, whose teachings greatly influenced the contemplative life. He was content to live with very little. Yet whenever he visited the magnificent city of Alexandria, he spent time wandering through its splendid bazaars. When asked why, he explained that his heart rejoiced at the sight of all the things he didn’t need.

Oh, that we could say the same thing after an afternoon at the mall!

One final thought…

Contentment can make poor people rich while discontentment makes rich people poor.

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

General George Patton was a stubborn, obstinate leader. He was nicknamed “Old Blood and Guts” and many say he was the greatest combat general of World War II. However, he could never admit being wrong about anything.

One story says that Patton accepted an invitation to dine at a press camp in Africa during World War II. Wine was served in canteen cups. Patton thought it was coffee, so he poured cream into his cup. As he stirred in sugar, Patton was told that his cup contained red wine and not coffee. General Patton could not admit making a mistake, so without hesitation he drank it and replied, “I know. I like my wine this way.”

There may be a little of Patton’s blood (hopefully not the guts) in each one of us. It is hard to admit when we are wrong. We are very concerned about what others think. Yet the benefits far outweigh our discomfort when we have the courage to admit we’ve made a mistake.

James 5:16 says, “Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another…” My favorite translation of this scripture says, “Admit your faults…(TLB) God will always forgive our sins, but when we admit to others that we are vulnerable or weak, it makes us a little more accountable for our actions.

Proverbs 28:13 says that those who try to hide their mistakes can’t really prosper. They have no peace of mind. They are always in fear that someone will find out. However, if we admit our mistakes and make a commitment to change, we get a second chance.

King David was called a man after God’s heart. (Acts 13:22) Why? He was not a man without sin. However, he was a person who could admit making a mistake.

When his predecessor King Saul made mistakes, he was not sorry for what he did – only sorry he got caught. For example, when God told Saul how to deal with Amalek, Saul chose to make compromises with God’s instructions. God wanted all of Amalek’s sheep and oxen destroyed, but that was not done. Saul and the men saved the best animals for themselves. (1 Samuel 15:8-9) To make matters worse, Saul did not take responsibility for his actions, but tried to pass the blame onto the people by saying, “The people saved the best animals to sacrifice to the Lord.” (1 Samuel 15:15)

When confronted and rebuked by Samuel, Saul finally said, “I have sinned.” Then he quickly added, “Yet honor me before the elders and Israel.” He wasn’t concerned about what he had done, only about how he would look in the eyes of others. (1 Samuel 15:30)

David is a different story. When he made mistakes – and he made some BIG ones – he was willing to admit them, genuinely repent, and change. When God didn’t want him to take a census of Israel and he did it anyway, he took the blame. “Let your hand, I pray, O Lord, be against me, but not against your people.” (1 Chronicles 21:17) When David realized having Bathsheba’s husband sent into David repented. (2 Samuel 11, 12)

Of course, he should have realized it all along, but he didn’t. He, like so many of us, wanted something so badly he was willing to do anything to get it. But when the light bulb went off in his head, he repented. He deeply repented. (2 Samuel 12:13) Read David’s Psalm of Repentance (Psalm 51) and see why he was a man after God’s own heart. David never tried to hide his mistakes. He admitted them, asked God’s forgiveness, and changed.

Consider this… It’s always risky to be open and honest about our mistakes. We think others will think less of us. That may be true to a certain degree, but most will come along side us, want us to succeed, and appreciate the courage it took to say, “I was wrong. I made a mistake.” These words can actually break down barriers and draw us closer to others.

Of course, if we’d rather go through life pretending we like a little cream and sugar in our wine, then bon appetit!

One final thought…

Making mistakes is not so bad. Not learning from them is a lot worse!