Barbara's Banter

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

Music has given me much joy through the years and I’m pretty good at identifying singers of old standards or early rock n’ roll. Being able to recognize someone’s voice is a great way to bore all your friends. “Who’s singing that?” I’ll say. They don’t care, of course, but I give the right answer and it fills me with a certain amount of pride. In the game of life, it’s not all that important to be able to recognize someone’s voice – unless it is the voice of God.

Hearing God’s voice is a tricky proposition. People tell me they hear God’s voice all the time. God tells them to do this or God tells them to do that, but I’m skeptical. Sometimes it seems like they are not really listening for God’s voice to guide them, but to put a stamp of approval on what they have already chosen to do. In that case you can get God’s voice to tell you anything you want to hear. And you can always blame God if it doesn’t work out. After all, He told you to do it!

God speaking directly to a person is the exception not the rule, even in biblical times. In ancient times people were not always happy to hear God’s voice. It was usually telling them to do something they didn’t want to do. Moses had to lead the complaining Israelites. (Exodus 3:14) Hosea had to marry a woman of ill repute. (Hosea 1:1) Job found out how insignificant he was. (Job 40:1) Paul was struck blind. (Acts 22)

Such was the case with Ahab. He wanted to attack the King of Aram. All his advisors knew he had already made up his mind and just wanted God to bless his decision. So they told him what he wanted to hear. “Go for it! You will win.” The prophet Micaiah cautioned him against going.

Ahab never cared much for Micaiah because he always told him the truth. In 1 Kings 22:8 (NLT) he said, “There is still one prophet of the Lord, but I hate him. He never prophesies anything but bad news for me! His name is Micaiah son of Imlah.” Ahab, like all of us, only wanted to hear support for what he wanted to do. If we listen closely, we may hear God’s voice. However, He may not tell us what we want to hear.

As God’s sheep we should be able to recognize His voice. (John 10:4-5, 27) However, we cannot recognize the voice of one we are not close to. Therefore, we need to be in constant relationship with God through prayer and Bible study – praying to align ourselves to God’s will and studying to become more like Jesus.

When Christ lives in us, recognizing His voice becomes easier because we know God’s voice will not tell us to do things contrary to the biblical principles He has set in motion. And He expects us to be able to discern what those are. A voice telling us to snipe people from a tall building or get revenge is not the voice of God.

However, God is the great communicator and He can speak to us in many ways. He can speak through…

• His Word: The Bible is written for our instruction, training, correction, and edification. (2 Timothy 3:16,17)
• Creation: We see God’s greatness in His creation. (Romans 1:20)
• Events: Through trials God may be saying, “Learn patience.” Through celebrations He may be saying, “Do not forget Me in the good times.” (James 1:2-5)
• Prayer: Prayer is two-way communication. We ask and God answers. (James 1:5) However, God does not always give us the answer we want to hear.
• Our Conscience: Sometimes an inner voice tells us not to do something. (1 Peter 3:16)
• Meditation: Slow down. Be still so you can hear God. (Psalm 46:10)
• Others: Friends can be closer than family at times and a wise man seeks counsel before making decisions. (Proverbs 18:24; Proverbs 11:14)

Consider this… Sometimes we are so intent on looking for a special sign or revelation that we miss what God says to us daily. The closer we are to God, the easier it is to hear and recognize His voice.

One final thought…

The voice of God will never contradict the Word of God.

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

Some things that happen in life are not easy to understand. It’s disconcerting when bad things happen to good people and puzzling when good things happen to bad people. This does not seem fair. When life is not fair, it can be a major source of irritation and frustration for most of us, so naturally we look for someone to blame. When we run out of people to blame, we want to blame God.

Some of us are willing to admit that every bad situation is not God’s fault. Sometimes we make poor choices. Sometimes we suffer because of the poor choices of others. And sometimes it’s just time and chance. (Ecclesiastes 9:11) However, many still want to blame God for what He allows to happen. After all, can’t God control everything? Can’t He keep us from screwing up? Can’t He keep someone from screwing us over? Can’t He shield us from every trial of life? Sure He can – but He doesn’t.

Ironically, those people who want to blame God when things go wrong usually aren’t thanking Him when things go right. It’s like we want to take the credit, but we like to give God the blame.

Unfortunately, bad stuff happens. We have all experienced things like financial setbacks, the unexpected death of a loved one, severe health problems, a bad marriage, job loss, drug addiction, and so on. Sometimes God intervenes and sometimes He doesn’t. But just because God doesn’t intervene in every unfair circumstance doesn’t mean He doesn’t love us.

The Bible is full of examples of Christians suffering unfairly. Nowhere does the Bible say life is easy. Joseph was thrown in a pit and sold into slavery. Stephen was martyred. Saul repeatedly tried to kill David. Jeremiah was ignored and abused. Jesus was crucified. The list goes on and on.

Life is hard, but the Christian has something other people don’t have in their hardships – God! God never promised life would be easy, but He did promise to be with us every step of the way. He promised He’d never leave or forsake us. He promised we’d never be alone. He promised His peace, comfort, and strength.

Instead of blaming God, perhaps we could take a different approach. What about trusting God? We can trust God to be with us. We can trust God to do what’s best overall – not just for us. (Romans 8:28) In fact, when those bad things happen is the time we need to hold our faith tightly. We need to trust even more.

The book of Job is a life lesson about bad things happening to good people. Job could be the poster boy for that scenario. Righteous Job lost everything – his health, his family, his fortune. Job was afflicted. Job suffered. When Job tries to make sense out of all of it, he questions God about it. “Why? Why? Why? Haven’t I done everything you wanted? Why are these things happening to me?”

Guess what? God neither explains nor defends what is happening to Job. However, God does answer a more significant question Job failed to ask. Who??? Who laid the foundations of the earth? Who is the Creator? Who has divine wisdom? Who is omnipotent? The list goes on and on. (Job 38-41) Job never finds out why, but he does find out Who – and ends up with more faith, confidence, and trust in God!

Consider this…. God is God. Either we have faith in Him or we don’t. God does not need to explain His actions to us. God does not need to apologize for what He does. God does not need to cower in a corner for not intervening when we thought He should. If the Lord gives and the Lord takes away, do we still bless the Lord? (Job 1:21) We should, because we need to remember who God is. God is love (1 John 4:8) – and He loves us. 

One final thought in a poem…

When Is the Time to Trust?

Selected from Streams in the Desert, devotional by L.B. Cowan, July 21

When is the time to trust?

Is it when all is calm,

When waves the victor’s palm,

And life is one glad psalm

Of joy and praise?

No! The time to trust

Is when the waves beat high,

When storm clouds fill the sky,

And prayer is one long cry,

“Oh, help and save!”

When is the time to trust?

Is it when friends are true?

Is it when comforts woo,

And in all we say and do

We meet but praise?

No! The time to trust

Is when we stand alone,

And summer birds have flown,

And every prop is gone,

Only God remains.

When is the time to trust?

Is it when hopes beat high,

When sunshine gilds the sky,

And joy and ecstasy

Fill all the heart?

No! The time to trust

Is when our joy has fled,

When sorrow bows the head,

And all seems cold and dead,

Only God sustains.

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

Our family name can give us a glimpse of who our ancestors were. For example, Irish names with an “O” or “Mac” indicate the person is the son, grandson, or descendant of a certain family such as O’Brian or MacDonald. A family name can tell what your family’s occupation might have been such as Miller, Cooper, Smith, or Shoemaker. Today, names do not have much significance other than designating one person from another.

This was not the case in biblical times. In fact, the word “name” in the Old Testament actually stands for “a mark or a brand.” In other words, the name would reflect who a person was. For example, Adam means “man.” Eve means “mother of all living.” Esau means “hairy” because he was hairy when he was born. Jacob means “heel catcher” because he was Esau’s twin, but Esau was born first.

When certain people developed a relationship with God, God changed their names to reflect that. Abram became Abraham which means “father of a multitude.” Jacob was changed to Israel which means “prince with God” because God was going to use his lineage. Simon became Peter which means “rock” because Jesus was going to use him to build the church upon.

In a way, that’s what happens to us when we recognize we are saved by the atoning blood of Jesus Christ and develop a relationship with Him. We are given a spiritual family name. We are called “Christians.” The name “Christian” was first given to the disciples in Antioch. (Acts 11:26) Have you ever wondered why? Did the disciples meet together and vote on what they should be called? Did the marketing team do a demographic study then send out a memo stating that henceforth and forevermore we shall be called Christians? I don’t think so.

These disciples were called Christians because they were defined by their actions. They were followers of Jesus Christ. Not only did they talk about Jesus, but they met together and were taught the scriptures. (Acts 11:20; Acts 11:26) Those who believed in Christ probably made certain positive changes in their lives. Others noticed this and gave them the name. It was the unbelievers who saw something different and special about this group of people, then called them Christians.

I think today we have cheapened the definition of Christian a bit. Society loosely defines people as Christians just because they attend church on Easter and Christmas. Webster’s defines a Christian as one who believes in Christ. On the surface this gives the impression one just needs to believe Christ existed. True Christians know better. Those who truly believe in Christ do much more than attend church twice a year. They realize they have been saved by Christ. They stand for the same principles Christ preached about. They sometimes suffer for righteousness’s sake. They serve a living Christ. They love God and their neighbors. They hunger after God’s Word. The list goes on and on.

Consider this… What about us? Do we embrace Christ’s teachings? Do we honor Him with our lives? Do others identify us with Christ – not because we are preaching and cramming Christ down their throats, but by how we live our lives? They should. After all, it is our family name.

One final thought…

Our name is our identity.

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

The love chapter is found in 1 Corinthians 13 and describes in detail exactly what true love looks like: Love is patient. Love is kind. It does not envy. It does not boast. It is not proud. It is not rude. It is not self-seeking. It is not easily angered. It keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth. It always protects, trusts, and hopes.

That’s a lot to ask of a person and almost impossible to attain without God’s help. Therefore, it would be wise to pray about those attributes found lacking in our lives. Simple prayers like the following might be helpful.

• Since love is patient, Lord, help me to be quick to listen, hesitant to criticize, and eager to encourage. Help me always remember Your patience with me and pass it on to others.
• Since love is kind, Lord, help my words and actions to be gentle and kind.
• Since love does not envy or boast and is not proud, Lord, help me have a humble heart and see the good in others.
• Since love is not rude or self-seeking, Lord, help me be respectful to everyone and consider their needs.
• Since love is not easily angered and keeps no record of wrongs, Lord, help me not to hold grudges and forgive others as You have forgiven me.
• Since love does not delight in evil and rejoices in truth, Lord, show me how to make a difference in the world by helping the helpless and defending the defenseless.
• Since love always protects and trusts, Lord, help me be accepting and warm to others – a refuge for those who need one.
• Since love always perseveres, Lord, help my heart continually be full of love for You and others.

Consider this… The world would have us believe that true love is a subconscious state of euphoria – rendering us helpless, making hearts beat faster, and casting a spell. Euphoric conditions rarely last. What will we do when euphoria fades and reality sets in?

One final thought          

Love is not somewhere we fall; love is something we do.

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

I love the Fourth of July. I love the barbeques and I love the fireworks. However, I sometimes wonder if I truly appreciate the freedom that makes this celebration possible. For freedom is not really free. As our forefathers found out, freedom has a price and sometimes requires great sacrifice.

Signing the Declaration of Independence was more than just writing a “John Hancock” on a piece of paper. Those men had courage. From the moment they signed their names, they became traitors in the eyes of the British. We romanticize that signers like John Adams and Thomas Jefferson became future presidents, and Benjamin Franklin’s wit and wisdom wowed the world, but most did not fare quite as well. They sacrificed a lot for our freedom.

Did you know that the British considered John Hancock and Sam Adams criminals and placed a price on their heads? The British chased Thomas McKean, George Reed, and William Hooper like foxes. They had to move their families from town to town to escape being captured. Ned (Edward) Rutledge, the youngest signer, and Thomas Hayward Jr. became prisoners of war. Richard Stockton was captured, tortured, and killed. James Otis was beaten by the British and left mentally deranged.

William Floyd, Lyman Hall, George Clymer, and Lewis Morris had their homes plundered and destroyed. While “Honest John” Hart was away, his wife died during an attack on their home. His children had to flee to neighbors for refuge. Francis Lewis had his Long Island mansion destroyed. His wife was imprisoned and tortured. The Revolutionary War swept away his fortune.

War costs money so many, other fortunes were lost, too. Lewis Morris was a wealthy merchant in Philadelphia. His home and business were destroyed. He ended up in debtor’s prison. Thomas Nelson died, leaving his family deeply in debt.

John Morton of Pennsylvania had all of his friends (mostly Quakers) turn against him. These stories could go on and on. The trials of all 56 men are too numerous to mention. They did more than sign a historic document; they sacrificed their lives for our freedom.

Someone else sacrificed His life for our freedom. His name is Jesus Christ. He was rich and, for us, he became poor (2 Corinthians 8:9). He died to give us freedom from sin (Romans 6:18, 22) and freedom from bondage (Galatians 5:1). He gave us the free gift of righteousness (Romans 5:17) and the free gift of grace (Ephesians 2:8). Through His death we have free justification (Romans 3:24). This list could go on and on as well.

Consider this… When Fourth of July rolls around, think about those who gave up much so we might have freedom – and think about Christ whose sacrifice allows us to truly enjoy the freedoms we have.

One final thought…

Freedom is not free. Someone always pays a price.

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

I have a phrase for helping me to accept what I cannot change: “It is what it is!”

Say you are seated in a restaurant, they bring the menu, and you notice there are no prices. You are too embarrassed to ask what the items cost or leave, so you order. When the bill comes – “it is what it is” – and you pay it, but the tip may be a little low.

Say you are traveling and have car trouble in a remote town. There is only one lone gas station and you need your car fixed. When the bill comes – “it is what it is” – so you just  to pay it.

Life is full of what I like to call “it is what it is” situations. Some are inconveniences such as: Your child gets sick at school and you must leave the big meeting you planned to  to so you can pick him up. You have a really, really bad hair day. Your car won’t start and you are late. You get lost. Men forget to shave. Women get a run in their pantyhose. “It is what it is” – so you deal with the situation.

Some circumstances are just soooo unfair: The other person gets the promotion. A debilitating illness strikes a loved one. Your girlfriend breaks up with you. Someone gossips about you. You do the work; your supervisor takes the credit. “It is what it is” – so you cope.

Other things may be unfair but you get the benefit: You get the promotion when the other guy should have gotten it. You survive the accident when you should have died. The cop didn’t give you a ticket even though you were speeding. “It is what it is” – so you rejoice!

You can’t control life, but with God’s help you can control your reaction to it. That’s what the first part of the serenity prayer is talking about.

            “GOD, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change…”

This serenity is not indifference to what we are going through. The prayer goes on to ask God for “courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”  This serenity is a peace that can only come from God. It passes all understanding. (Philippians 4:6-7) We don’t need to fret or worry. We know God is with us. This kind of peace or serenity can only come through a relationship with God.

Much of life is a mystery. We don’t know what will come next all the time. It is what it is! I think God planned it that way. If we knew everything, we wouldn’t need faith. We don’t know what tomorrow holds. It is what it is! Fortunately, we know Who holds tomorrow. And God will see us through whatever lies ahead, if we let Him.

Consider this… The great “I AM” (John 8:58) can help us make it through any “it is what it is” situations that come along in our lives!

One final thought…

Sometimes good things may fall apart so better things can fall together.

 The Serenity Prayer

GOD, grant me the serenity

to accept the things

I cannot change,

Courage to change the

things I can, and the

wisdom to know the difference.

Living ONE DAY AT A TIME;

Enjoying one moment at a time;

Accepting hardship as the

pathway to peace.

Taking, as He did, this

sinful world as it is,

not as I would have it.

Trusting that He will make

all things right if I

surrender to His Will;

That I may be reasonably happy

in this life, and supremely

happy with Him forever in

the next. Amen

Reinhold Neibuhr-1926

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

In December 2003, a big earthquake hit central California. It was the biggest earthquake to hit the area since 1952 and one of the most widely felt in California history. The jolt stemmed from a fault line near San Simeon where the famed Hearst Castle is located. Buildings as far away as San Francisco swayed and many in nearby Paso Robles collapsed including their historic Clock Tower, causing two deaths. Paso Robles was 24 miles from the epicenter. Oddly enough Hearst Castle, which was only 11 miles from the epicenter, sustained very little damage. One might ask, “Why?”

The answer could be because of Julia Morgan who designed the famed Hearst Castle. She was a woman way ahead of her time. Born in San Francisco, Morgan was the only woman to complete a civil engineering degree from the University of California in 1872. While other ladies dreamed of marriage and babies, Morgan dreamed of building the houses they would live in. She traveled to Paris to study architecture but was refused admission for two years because she was a woman. They eventually were forced to accept her after she won almost every prestigious architecture competition in Europe.

After returning to San Francisco, she opened her “Julia Morgan: Architect” office and never lacked for business. In 1919, William Randolph Hearst chose Julia Morgan to design the “ranch,” his affectionate term for Hearst Castle, in central California’s sleepy hamlet of San Simeon. Morgan’s engineering and architectural background as well as her experience using reinforced concrete made her well suited for the enormous task. She spent the next 25 years working closely with Hearst on every detail of the Castle. They discussed everything from structure design to purchasing and placing antiques and works of art – even which vacuum cleaner to buy.  

Rumors would have us believe that Hearst plucked Julia from obscurity and took a chance by giving her this golden opportunity but not so. Julia Morgan had a 20 year, well established career by the time she met him. Some Hearst Castle tour guides say that Morgan was chosen because her buildings withstood the 1906 earthquake. That is not documented but may be closer to the truth. In any case, her Hearst Castle withstood the 2003 earthquake which adds to her legacy.

Let’s contrast that to the collapse of the 111-year-old historic Clock Tower of Paso Robles, which was renovated just 12 years before the 2003 earthquake. Unfortunately, during the renovation no one took the time, effort, or expense to reinforced it so it would withstand an earthquake, even though Paso Robles is located near a well-known fault zone.

It reminds me of the old biblical parable about the wise man and foolish man. (Matthew 7:24-27) The foolish man built his house on the sand and when the rains came, it collapsed. The wise man built his house on the rock and when the rains came, it stood firm. A good foundation can make all the difference in the world. Do we have one? God makes a mighty good foundation. In fact, Matthew 7:24 says, “Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock.”

Consider this… If we want to withstand the earthquakes in life, we need a good, spiritual foundation.

One final thought…

You can’t build a great building on a weak foundation. It will eventually collapse.

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

Ever since Norman Cousins’ bestselling 1979 book Anatomy of an Illness as Perceived by the Patient: Reflections on Healing and Regeneration was published, more and more studies have surfaced to promote the healing power of humor. Cousins was editor of The Saturday Review for almost forty years. When stricken with a life-threatening arthritic disease, the almost paralyzed Cousins was given only a few months to live. He didn’t seem to be making good progress with his drug treatment, so he left the hospital and prescribed himself a healthy dose of laughter. 

He watched old Marx Brothers’ movies, among other things, and read humor books. He discovered that “ten minutes of genuine belly laughter had an anesthetic effect and would give me at least two hours of pain-free sleep.” To the amazement of his doctors, he slowly regained the use of his limbs and recovered.

Since then a number of studies have been done on humor therapy. They are finding that laughter can boost the immune system, provide higher pain tolerance, increase respiratory capacity, reduce heart attack risk, help control diabetic blood sugar levels, relax muscles, decrease stress hormones, and curb allergy symptoms. Some findings show laughter can have some of the same positive effects as exercise. So don’t feel guilty watching those old I Love Lucy reruns unless, of course, you are chowing down on chips and dip. Even laughter has its limitations!

Voltaire said, “The art of medicine consists of keeping the patient amused while nature heals the disease.” Or more simply put, “A cheerful heart is good medicine.” (Proverbs 17:21) Laughter is good medicine and, coupled with a positive attitude, creates a deadly combination…or should I say life-affirming combination.

It’s one thing to laugh at the antics of another in a movie, TV show, book, cartoon, or comic monologue but quite another to see the funny side of everyday life. It would behoove all of us to look at small annoyances as small annoyances and not life-shattering events. Humor can give us a sense of perspective on our problems.

Unfortunately, some grumps wouldn’t laugh if you wiggled a feather on the bottom of their foot or any other part of their anatomy. People who can’t laugh could start with smiling. It’s something they can force so no one knows what grumps they are.

Consider this… Studies show that even a forced smile makes a person happier and lessens stress. So it not only enhances your life but the lives of those you meet.

Or you can buy a clown nose and wear it. Hey – do whatever works for you because laughter is good medicine.

One final thought…

We don’t laugh because we’re happy. We are happy because we laugh.

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

 When I was 16 I had a rude awakening. (Actually, I had many rude awakenings at 16, but I’ll just focus on one in this article.) It happened at a sleepover. There we were – six giggly girls in pajamas all barefoot. Suddenly, I looked at one girl’s foot and said, “Your foot is shaped kind of funny, isn’t it?”

She said, “I don’t think so.” To prove her point, we all formed a little circle and put one foot in the middle. To my chagrin, everyone’s feet looked the same except mine. Mine was different. Not just different, but a little misshapen and sort of ugly. Fortunately, my friends did not ostracize me, but having funny-looking feet is a burden I carry even to this day.

Now don’t get me wrong. I walk just fine, have no foot problems, and have not been traumatized for this less than perfect feature. My feet are sturdy and serve me well. However, I’m not the first one to say, “Let’s go get a pedicure!” Who wants to draw attention to funny feet?

Therefore, poetic, biblical metaphors about beautiful feet fascinate me. For example, Isaiah 52:7 (NLT) says, “How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news of peace and salvation, the news that the God of Israel reigns!” Leave it to God to use a metaphor about feet and make it seem beautiful – especially during a time when no one could boast of pretty feet!

In biblical times the custom was to go barefoot or wear sandals that could be easily slipped off and on. People walked to their destinations on dusty, unpaved country roads or through filthy streets, so feet took a lot of abuse. They were rough and calloused. When people visited or came home, they left their sandals at the door and washed their dirty feet before entering a house.

When these people heard a statement about feet being beautiful, they would probably look down and say, “How can my feet be beautiful?” But it’s the message that makes the feet beautiful, not the feet themselves. Everyone loves good news. Good news gladdens the heart and inspires. And if ugly, dirty feet are bringing the good news – well, then they are considered beautiful.

Feet that carry good news remind me of missionaries who feel called to share the gospel in remote areas, sometimes placing their lives in danger. Some live in mud huts with no running water and face cultural mores we can only imagine. We take literacy and written communication for granted, but some missionaries struggle with languages no Berlitz program has heard of – some with no alphabet, no written word, and no Bible. Yet, the love of God can transcend the heaviest challenge.

There are many places beautiful feet take the good news of peace and salvation in America. Christian volunteers do it all the time in prisons, hospitals, retirement homes, veteran’s facilities, homeless shelters, soup kitchens, and rehab centers.

Sharing the gospel isn’t just for Bible teachers, preachers, and those inclined to serve in the areas already mentioned. All who know Jesus can share Him on a personal level with friends, neighbors, coworkers, and family members. We can share the good news of Jesus with all we meet. This doesn’t mean we force salvation on unsuspecting acquaintances, but as we model Christian behavior, some may become curious. We can answer any questions people might have about Jesus and not shy away from sharing His good news of peace and salvation.

Consider this… How beautiful are your feet? Mine are misshapen, border on being ugly, and look funny.  But even funny feet become beautiful when they share the good news of Jesus Christ.

One final thought…

Keep your eyes on God and your feet on the ground!

Yet Another Year of Choices

By Barbara Dahlgren

I must admit that sometimes peace eludes me. I’m not talking about the “peace which passes understanding.” (Philippians 4:7) When I think of the “peace which passes understanding,” I think of God calming the child in the midst of the raging storm. I think of severe trials exercising faith muscles to the point where “peace” endorphins kick in. I think of crises altering an outlook, forcing one to re-evaluate and be thankful for the most important things in life. When these events happen, I realize I have no control over the outcome; so although they are gut wrenching, it’s a little easier to lift them up to God.

I’m talking about “everyday” peace which some might call peace of mind or inner peace. As that famous philosopher Anonymous once said, “It isn’t the mountains ahead that wear you out. It’s the grain of sand in your shoe.” Here are some of my grains of sand: nagging thoughts that get the better of me, being anxious when I have nothing really to feel anxious about, thinking the worst of others instead of the best, making mountains out of molehills, losing my perspective, getting upset because I’m inconvenienced, and wanting to punch inconsiderate, thoughtless, or irritating people.

Inner peace is described as tranquility of order. If this is true, there can be no peace where there is no order. Unfortunately, most of our lives lack order. Life tends to be messy, inconvenient, and stressful. Some cope or look for peace by drinking, taking drugs, making money, buying things, or eating. These forms of self-medication may give temporary relief, but being numb or catatonic is not quite the same as achieving peace.

There are many areas of my life that I have no control over. However, by trying to integrate some of the following practices into my life, even where I lack control I can have some inner peace.

• Mind my own business.
• Forgive others and myself.
• Forget the past. Move on!
• Don’t overextend. Learn to say, “No!”
• Be happy for others, not jealous.
• Accept what cannot be changed.
• Learn to be patient and/or tolerant.
• Count blessings. Be thankful.
• Choose friends wisely. Stay away from negative people.
• Don’t take everything personally.
• Simplify life. Get rid of clutter.
• Learn to laugh.
• Slow down. Find quiet time.
• Do something nice for someone else.
• Think before speaking.

Yet, it’s easier said than done. Chances are that if I’m stressed because I haven’t done the above, I have no one to blame but myself. Many times I’m angry with others when I’m the one who could have avoided the problem.

Consider this… Ultimately, all peace comes from God – the peace which passes understanding and inner peace. Without a relationship with God, we will never have true peace. God gives His peace to those who trust Him (John 14:27) and focus on Him (Isaiah 26:3), so they have no need to be anxious about anything (Philippians 4:6). Until we connect with God, we search and search, looking for “peace, peace, when there is no peace (Jeremiah 6:14).”

I guess I need to pray more and fret less – and stay miles away from inconsiderate, thoughtless, or irritating people.

One final thought…

He who angers you controls you. Don’t let others steal your inner peace.