Last time we discussed the importance of listening to others. The old adage about God giving us one mouth and two ears so we should probably be listening more than talking still rings true. However there are times when we get the opportunity to speak. When those times come, the Bible exhorts us to choose our words carefully and use them wisely. Therefore we should think before we speak. (James 1:19)
Words have a life of their own. This is why we must be cautious in what we say to others. Even if we apologize for making careless statements to or about others that does not erase what was said. We cannot strike it from the record or take it back, because people will remember it even if we say we didn’t really mean it. Spoken words don’t just dissolve into the air. They live on and damage is done.
No wonder the Bible speaks so much about taming our tongues. (James 3) Both David and James use the metaphor of bridling our tongues. (Psalms 39:1; James 1:26) A bridle is a leather harness and bit placed in a horse’s mouth to control it. That might seem a bit drastic to us, but in all honesty some of us could benefit from a built in muzzle that clamps over our mouths when we are about to say something we are going to regret.
The biblical admonitions about guarding our tongues are plentiful…
- Do not have a flattering tongue (Psalm 5:9)
- Do not have a haughty tongue (Psalm 12:2-4)
- Do not have a lying tongue (Proverbs 25:18)
- Do not have a back biting tongue (Proverbs 25:23)
- Do not have a talebearers tongue (Proverbs 18:8)
- Do not have a cursing tongue (Romans 3:13, 14)
- Do not have a sharp tongue (Proverbs 12:18)
- Do not have a gossiping tongue (Romans 1:29)
Consider this… Heartfelt words spoken with kindness, consideration, and love are beautiful. (Proverbs 25:11) Careless, thoughtless words can be poisonous. (James 3:8)
Solomon said to weigh our words carefully. (Ecclesiastes 5:2, 3) Jesus said what goes into our mouths is not as important as what we say. (Matthew 15:11) James said to think before we speak. (James 1:19)
Suggestions for practicing this choice…
- Don’t be too quick to respond. A moment of thought or a little hesitation might improve what you want to say immensely.
- If you are discussing a delicate situation, say a little, mental-prayer before you respond. “Lord, what should I say? Please guide my words. Please put in my mouth your words.”
- If you are thinking you probably shouldn’t say something, then don’t say it. A good clue is when you say, “I probably shouldn’t say this but…”
- Don’t pretend to know what you are talking about when you don’t. And don’t assume you know what you are talking about.
- Before you speak, think about this acronym.
