Barbara's Banter

We miss the mark by thinking God’s love for us depends on how we are or what we do. We think we must change for God to love us. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Believe it or not, God loves the “real” us! Now we might want to make some changes in our lives, but not to earn God’s love.

We live in a society that constantly tells us we are not lovable. Media bombards us with subliminal messages that we aren’t thin enough, pretty enough, smart enough, talented enough, good enough and so on. We evaluate ourselves by some lofty, unattainable standard. Let’s face it – even the most beautiful movie star is air brushed and sometimes enhanced when they appear on a magazine cover.

These false criteria can lead us to have poor opinions of ourselves. What we think about ourselves can influence how we live our lives. This is sad, because what we think about ourselves, what others think about us and what we think others think about us can all be inaccurate gauges of reality. There will always be someone better looking, more popular and thinner than us and guess what? That’s okay. God created you to be you and me to be me.

I think there is some wisdom in what Oscar Wilde said. “Be yourself – everyone else is already taken.”

Our self worth should come from what God thinks of us – and God loves us. God doesn’t love us because we are pretty, smart, wise, talented or good. He loves us the “real” us. We don’t have to earn God’s love or our salvation. Salvation is a gift from God. (Ephesians 2:8) If it were based on our actions, we would try to take the credit. We would think our good deeds earned us salvation.

How wise God is! He knew we could never be good enough to deserve his love, so he just gives it to us. Martin Luther once wrote, “The most damnable and pernicious heresy that has every plagued the mind of man is the idea that somehow he could make himself good enough to deserve to live with an all-holy God.”

In New Testament times people kept thinking they needed to do something to earn God’s free grace. Such was the case with circumcision. Paul wanted to set the record straight. Becoming circumcised would not earn God’s love. That way of thinking devalues God’s gift. (Galatians 5)

People spend a lot of time perfecting an image, so they will be “loveable.” I guess it’s hard to believe that someone could love the “real” us, but God does. And he longs to have a relationship with the “real” us. I know it’s hard to believe but God knows our weaknesses and frailties, and loves us anyway. We don’t have to pretend to be something we are not.

So let’s get “real” with God and let him lavish his real love us.

We just returned from a trip to visit Hoover Dam and the Grand Canyon and I must admit the whole trip was…well…what’s the word I’m looking for???? Oh yes, GRAND!

Hoover Dam is considered one of the seven manmade wonders in the United States and the Grand Canyon is one of the seven natural wonders of the modern world. Of course, these lists are always being updated, but nonetheless, these two sites are wonders to behold.

Hoover Dam is located in the Black Canyon of the Colorado River on the border between Arizona and Nevada. This concrete arch-gravity dam is one of the world’s largest hydro-electric generating stations. Named after our 31st president Herbert Hoover, who was instrumental in having the dam built and settling a 25-year water allocation controversy with nearby states, the dam began construction in 1931 and was completed ahead of schedule under budget in 1936. That alone is a “manmade” wonder!

As impressive as the Hoover Dam is, it really can’t compare to the Grand Canyon, a God made wonder. Located in Arizona, the Grand Canyon is 277 miles long, up to 18 miles wide and over a mile deep. Carved by the erosion of the Colorado River, the canyon is estimated to have taken millions of years to form. It is difficult to say which view is moremajestic: looking down the steep crevices from the top or staring up at the layers of exposed rock from the bottom. We did both by taking a helicopter down into the canyon and a pontoon boat ride on the Colorado River.

Looking at any view of the Grand Canyon literally takes your breath away and gives meaning to scriptures. Not only do the heavens declare God’s glory (Psalm 19:1), but so do wondrous sites under the heavens. Isaiah 40:12 says that God has measured the water in the palm of his hand. Not only has God created Earth and it’s wonders, but the whole universe. (Isaiah 40:25, 26)

However, as impressive as these wonders of the world are, there are two other wonders of God that never cease to amaze me – his love and his grace. (Galatians 1:3) God loves us the way we are. Nothing we ever do will make him love us any more or any less. God loves us so much he let his son die for us while we were sinners. (John 3:16, 17; Romans 5:8) We did nothing to earn this. (Ephesians 2:8) God’s grace brings us salvation. (Titus 2:11)

Which makes me ask the question, “Will wonders never cease?” Not as long as God is around, that’s for sure!

(Pictures by Barbara Dahlgren)

Once Jesus asked his disciples, “Whom do men say that I am?” Some said he was John the Baptist, some said Elias, some said a prophet and so on. Jesus was no doubt curious.

When he asked Peter he replied, “You are Christ, the son of the living God.” (Matthew 16:13-17) It pleased Jesus that Peter realized this. After all, Christ knew who he was even if those he came in contact weren’t quite sure.

How about us? Do we know who we are?

Once we turn our lives over to God we belong to him. And from that very moment our identity changes and we become new people. (2 Cor. 5:17, Eph. 4:24) Sometimes just knowing who we are can make a difference in how we live our lives. Here is just a sampling of who we are:

• We are God’s children (John 1:12, Gal. 4:7)
• We are loved. (John 3:16, Col. 3:12)
• We are Jesus’ friends. (John 15:15)
• We are accepted. (Romans 15:7)
• We are chosen. (Eph. 1:4, Col. 3:12, 1 Thess. 1:4)
• We are redeemed. (Ephesians 1:7)
• We are justified. (Romans 3:24)
• We are saved, not condemned. (Romans 8:1)
• We are free, not slaves. (Rom. 6:6, Rom. 8:2, Gal. 4:7, Gal. 5:1)
• We are heirs. (Rom. 8:17, Gal. 4:7, Eph. 1:11)
• We are dwelling places for the Holy Spirit. (1 Cor. 6:19)
• We are led by God. (2 Cor. 2:14)
• We are righteous. (2 Cor. 2:15, 2 Cor. 5:21)
• We are blessed. (Ephesians 1:3)
• We are alive in Christ. (Ephesians 1:4-5)
• We are complete in Christ. (Col. 2:10)

Our identity is now in Christ. All these attributes are who we are in Christ, not earned by us but freely given.

The Bible says as a man thinks, so he is. (Proverbs 23:7) How we perceive ourselves makes a difference in how we act, how we react, how we live.

So who do you think you are? We can’t afford to get caught up in who others might think we are. We have an abundant life and rich inheritance. After all, we are God’s children!

When we were kids if asked what we wanted to be when we grew up the answers varied. For the very young the possibilities were endless – singers, movie stars, astronauts, ballerinas, architects, professional athletes, and so on. As we aged a bit we realized how much work and effort goes into being successful in those professions so we may have lowered expectations a bit. Yet, we all had dreams. I guess the one answer we would never have given is that when we grew up we wanted to be “old.”

Yet, aging is one thing all humans have in common and no amount of liposuction or cosmetic surgery will keep it from happening. Growing older is inevitable and eventually death. I don’t say this to be morbid; I’m just stating a fact. Psalm 89:48 basically says, “What man lives and never sees death?” The answer is no one. Of course, some die young, but the majority of people are living longer and longer.

We see more and more estate sales or auctions, the end result of an elderly person passing away. I can’t help but think that this is how we all end up one way or another – all our priceless possessions, treasured collections, and memorabilia either on sale at bargain prices or haggled over by loved ones. And something we once consider so valuable or full of deep meaning for us ends up in a bonfire, because it certainly has no deep meaning for anyone else.

Shades of the closing scene of the movie Citizen Kane come to mind. Kane was one of the richest men in the world and while dying he whispers his last words, “Rosebud…rosebud.” Who knew Rosebud was referring to the trademark name for a cheap little sled on which he was playing the day he was taken away from his mother and pictured a time when he felt loved???? (Seriously, who knew? It certainly wasn’t made clear in the movie. It was only after I read an interview by producer, director, and star Orson Wells that I found out.)

But I digress. The point is that even he who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead, and most of those toys are sold to the highest bidder.

As I look at my china cabinet loaded with bric-a-brac from events like a World’s Fair or an excursion to Italy, I know those things aren’t really going to be meaningful to anyone but me. They probably won’t even bring a high price at my “end of days” yard sale. But I had a lot of fun gathering them from here and there.

There’s not much in this world of value in the long run. Happy is the person who knows this mortal home is a temporary dwelling.

Recently an elderly woman we knew was told she had a very short time to live. She didn’t really seem concerned. The doctor said, “You do know what I’m telling you, don’t you?”

“Yes,” she said. “You’re telling me I’m going home to be with the Lord and I don’t have to pack. I hate packing.” She was ready to meet her maker and leave it all behind.

Unlike Citizen Kane, Joseph Addison was a real person – a British essayist, poet, playwright, and politician. His play Cato, a Tragedy dealt with individual liberty versus government tyranny. It was well known in the colonies and believed to be a literary inspiration for the American Revolution, as well as several well known quotes from that era such as Patrick Henry’s, “Give me liberty or give me death” and Nathan Hale’s, “I regret that I have but one life to give for my country.” I love his final words: “See in what peace a Christian can die.”

When my time comes I’ll be old. I’m already almost there. Old is not what I noted on my “what I want to be when I grow up list” when I was a kid but I think I secretly aspired to living a long and productive life. I’m happy to have made it thus far.

At the end of my life I’m hoping to gracefully leave it all behind. Let someone else sell it, haggle over it, or haul it to Goodwill. The old hymn lyrics “this earth is not my home, I’m just passing through” comes to mind. After all, our home is really with God and nothing can separate us from his love – not even death. In the end, this is really all that is of any value. (Romans 8:35-39)

The Bible is full of examples of one person changing the course of history. Daniel was instrumental in influencing King Nebuchadnezzar and Queen Esther saved her people from destruction by risking her life to go before the king. Of course, most of us are thinking we won’t be coming into contact with many kings, presidents, or government officials to charm or sway – and we would be right.

However, it’s unfortunate when we think what we do doesn’t matter. While it is true most of us won’t be changing the course of governments, global warming, social reform, or much of anything else on a grand scale, we do affect the lives of each and every person we come into contact with – and what we do makes a difference.

I think of the example of Rahab the harlot. I always identify more with her type of person than Esther. Not because I’m promiscuous or a hooker, but because if I lived in biblical times I’m sure I wouldn’t be living as royalty. If I were in the palace I would probably be there to clean it rather than luxuriate.

So here we have Rahab who has three handicaps in the eyes of any self respecting Israelite. She was a Gentile which was considered pagan. She was a woman in a time when women had no rights. She was a prostitute which was the lowest form of a woman. Let’s just say she didn’t have a lot going for her. Yet she is listed among the faithful in Hebrews. (Hebrews 11:31)

When the Israelite spies entered her city of Jericho she risked her life to hide them. Not only did she hide them but she sent the soldiers looking for them on a wild goose chase. Then she helped the spies escape. (Joshua 2) The Bible doesn’t really tell us why she did this. Perhaps she had heard the stories of how the Israelite God had delivered his people time and time again. She obviously believed not only the stories but that such a God existed.

In return for her kindness she asked the spies to spare not only her life, but the lives of her family when they attacked. (Joshua 2:12-13) When Joshua and the Israelites attacked Jericho and the walls came tumbling down, the Israelites attacked and killed everything that breathed in the city – everything except Rahab and her family. (Joshua 6:22 – 27)

Now Rahab was only one person, yet because of her actions not only was she spared but her whole family as well. Her family did nothing to deserve deliverance. However, what she did affected their lives greatly. It made the difference between life and death.

As Christians we affect those around us. Our community watches if we stand up for what is right. Our unconverted spouses can be won over, not by preaching the gospel to them, but living it. (1 Peter 3:1) Our children watch every move we make and either learn how to love, be compassionate, and show kindness or how to hate and think only of themselves.

So does one person make a difference? Rahab did.

Perhaps the better question is do I make a difference?

Well, although President Obama won’t be counseling with me before he makes his next big decision I have a meager sphere of influence. So I guess the answer is yes. I do make a difference – or at least I should – especially to those closest to me.

Today is the ten year anniversary of 9/11. How appropriate that it would fall on a Sunday, for in spite of the devastation those terrorist attacks caused, it left the American people focused on what they ultimately believe really matters: family, friends, country, and God. Just about every Sunday sermon will be making some reference to 9/11. Tragedies do tend to bring us together.

There are few times in life when we can all recall where we were when it happened. With me it would be when J.F. Kennedy was shot, when Armstrong walked on the moon, and when the World Trade Center was hit. When those planes crashed into the twin towers I was in the middle of nowhere in SE MO. We had attended a Labor Day family reunion and stayed on for a few days to visit family on a farm. Even though our location was remote we still had contact with the rest of the world via radio, television, and telephone.

First the phone calls came telling us to turn on the television which we did immediately. Someone had captured the destruction on video camera and they were showing it on TV. At first it looked like a badly filmed movie. Then the realization that this was really happening gradually began to sink in. It was impossible to drive back to St. Louis and fly home to CA because planes were grounded. It would have cost us a fortune just to get St. Louis anyway because gas stations started inflating their prices big time, eager to cash in on the misfortune.

Even though many of us were not affected personally by the tragedy, most knew someone who was. My son was in high school in CA and one his best friend’s sisters was on the flight that crashed before it reached the Pentagon. 9/11 wasn’t just an attack on New York it was an attack on our nation.

There was a spiritual revival after 9/11 for in crucial times people turn to God. But years pass, wounds heal, and sometimes we forget. Perhaps a ten year anniversary can rekindle that spirit. After all, we don’t always need a tragedy to bring us together, do we? Perhaps a time of remembrance can serve the same purpose.

And there is much to remember. We can remember the 3000 lives that were lost. We can remember the selfless acts of compassion of ordinary people doing extraordinary acts of heroism. We can remember that we Americans are not immune from the type of devastation we only hear about happening in other parts of the world. We can remember that a crisis need not weaken our faith, but can strengthen it.

This Sunday sermon themes will range from humility to moving forward to hope to forgiveness. Forgiveness will be a common thread, for ours is not a nation full of revenge. Justice – yes. Revenge – no.

Remembrance will be another oft repeated word. This Sunday significant hymns will be sung, ceremonial candles lit, solemn prayers lifted, dramatic readings recited, and poignant tributes given to help us reflect and remember. I think these are all good things to do – lest we forget.

Primary colors are colors in their own right. In other words they cannot be generated through the mixing of other colors. The basic primary colors are considered to be red, yellow, and blue. However, when we look at the world around us we see more colors than these.

 Amazingly, God has taken these basic colors and created a multicolored, multifaceted world. We have rich, brilliant, dynamic, and vibrant tones mixed with muted, soft, and subdued hues. Light and shadows are added to produce variances. God knew that all one or two colors would be boring. So he created contrast.

God in his infinite wisdom also allows contrast in our lives. The range of emotions he has given us adds texture to our existence. Like a fine tapestry our lives are woven with a mixture of joy and sorrow, laughter and tears, happiness and despair, peace and turmoil, jubilation and grief, success and struggle, faith and doubt, and so on. We can’t really appreciate the good times unless we’ve experienced some bad times.

This is true of every aspect of our lives. Food is more delicious if we have known hunger. Sleep is more blissful if we have worked hard. A drink of water is more quenching if we’ve been dehydrated. Friendship is more valued if we’ve been lonely. Dawn is more beautiful if we’ve lived through the darkness. Life is more precious if we’ve seen death.

We come to know God and appreciate him more fully because we don’t live a one dimensional life filled with just the pleasantries we want. Through adversities we learn to walk by faith, not by sight. We learn to trust God and rest in him. We learn to hear God’s voice and feel his presence. We experience the peace that passes understanding and the comfort of God’s love. We come to know that God’s grace is sufficient for us. For in our weakness we rely on God’s strength. (2 Corinthians 12: 9, 10)

It’s true that we live in a multicolored world full of contrasting hues, tones, and shades. God designed it that way so we could more fully appreciate him as Creator. God also allows the contrasts in our lives so we can more fully appreciate him as our Lord and Savior.

My ability to procrastinate amazes me. I can find more things to do to keep from doing what I need to do than anyone I know. Idleness is not my problem. I stay plenty busy, but I stay busy doing things I don’t need to do. Like the definition, I am the classic example of “putting off intentionally and habitually doing what should be done.” Sometimes I abhor myself for this trait – but not enough to change.

Yes, I know all the pithy sayings designed to motivate me to get started. I repeat them to myself as I sit at my computer starting a new writing project with these results:

The journey of a thousand miles starts with one step. WOW! Just thinking about a thousand mile journey makes me tired. You know, I didn’t get much sleep last night. Maybe I should take a nap and get started after I feel refreshed.

To start is half the battle. Oh, that reminds me that I wanted to record that documentary they are showing tonight on PBS about the battle of Gettysburg. I better go set the DVR right now before I forget.

Steady, slow and consistent can accomplish more than brilliant spasms of work. Brilliant! Yes, I want this thing I’m writing to be brilliant, but my mind doesn’t seem real sharp right now. I bet if I played a game of computer Solitaire it would sharpen my senses. Keeping the mind active helps ward off Alzheimer’s, you know.

How do you eat an elephant – one bite at a time. That reminds me I skipped lunch. Maybe I should make myself a sandwich. Better yet I’ll just pop out and get a burger. Where is that coupon I had for a dollar off the combo? After I eat I’ll feel like working.

Life is like a coin you can spend anyway you want, but you can only spend it once. Maybe I should put all those coins I’ve been saving in that Mason jar in those little nickel, dime, and quarter wrappers, take them to the bank and see how much I have. I could use the money to buy my burger.

Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can do today. Where is that “to-do” list I was making for tomorrow? I just thought of a few more things I need to put on it. Better put them on the list now before I forget. I just love checking off things on my “to-do” list when I get them done. But what did I do with that list???

No farmer ever plowed a field by turning it over in his head. You know, my Uncle John is a farmer. He’s pretty old and I haven’t talked to him in a while. I think I’ll give him a call. I always feel so inspired after we chat.

The road to hell is paved with good intentions. Where is that Rob Bell book I was reading about hell, anyway? Maybe I should read a little of it. Hey, if there is anything that will motivate me it’s thinking about going to hell. Motivate me???? What is it I’m trying to do? Sorry, I lost my concentration. What was I talking about? Oh yes! Procrastination!

Now here’s one that works well for me – just do it! We can never redeem all the wasted time (Ephesians 5:15) so just do it! Do it now! That’s how I got this blog written! I just did it!

I found this little poem on the Internet while procrastinating that ties in well with this blog topic.

Procrastination is my sin.
It brings me naught but sorrow.
I know that I should stop it.
In fact, I will…tomorrow.
                                        ~Gloria Pitzer

Hey, maybe I’ll go look more stuff up on the Internet. I have another writing project and it’s a great way to delay getting started. After all, the journey of a thousand miles begins with one step. WOW! Just thinking about a thousand mile journey makes me tired. Maybe I’ll take a nap.

Hmm…I guess old habits are hard to break!

In Matthew 6:9-13 we have what is called “The Lord’s Prayer.” Considered a model prayer it’s used as a guide in teaching us how to pray. Most have it memorized. It starts with “Our father which art in heaven…” and ends with “…for thine is the kingdom, the power, and the glory, forever and ever. Amen.” Nestled in the middle of this adulation for God is a little phrase: “Thy will be done…” How many of us say this phrase in prayers? If we do, what does it mean to us?

Do we pray it because God is greater than us and we know he’s going to do what he wants to do anyway in our lives? Do we pray it because God is smarter than us and so we know he’s arranging all our lives to suit himself? Are we just pawns on the chess board of life with God moving us here and there for his amusement? So we just say, “Thy will be done” because God will do what he wants to do anyway. Are we thinking we have no choices in life so why not say to God, “Just do what you want because what I want doesn’t matter anyway.” Sort of like something we’d say if we didn’t want to argue with someone any longer.

If those are our motives in saying, “Thy will be done” then we are missing the point.

We do have something to say about our wants, wishes, and desires. God listens to us with his heart as well as his head. He has given us free will and does not force us to always do what he wants. If that were the case none of us would ever sin or hurt ourselves. He allows us to go our own way if that’s what we want. God does not use his supreme power to control us. God is not a God of control; he is a God of love.

As we grow in our relationship with God we learn more fully that he truly loves us. He wants only the best for us. When we realize God is compassionate, loving, and kind, we actually want to surrender our will to his. We trust him.

It’s not wrong to make our wishes known. Jesus did this in the Garden of Gethsemane when facing the crucifixion. He prayed “My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.” (Matthew 26:39) However he deferred to God because of the love relationship he had with him.

In addition to praying for God’s will to be done is our lives we can ask him to reveal his will to us so we can actively participate in what he wants. You see, prayer should not focus on trying to talk God into giving us what we want. Prayer is a time to align our will with God’s.

If we say, “Thy will be done” as a condescending acceptance of God’s power, we will never know the God of love. However, those words spoken in humility, surrender, and desire for God’s involvement in our lives can give us joy and a peace that passes all understanding – even when we don’t get what we want. (Philippians 4:7)

An old adage declares that “beauty is as beauty does.” My mother used to say “beauty is skin deep, but ugliness is to the bone.” These sayings are meant to teach us that it is more important to focus on inward beauty than outward beauty. Society obviously didn’t learn that message because our modern world is enamored with glitz and glamour.

People Magazine runs an issue of the 100 Most Beautiful People every year – and they are not focusing on inner beauty, that’s for sure. They used to have only “50 Most Beautiful People” but now it’s 100. I guess those extreme makeovers and nip/tucks are making more and more people beautiful in the eyes of the public.

We have beauty pageants, glamour magazines, and beauty salons. One of my favorite movie lines comes from Steel Magnolias. Truvy, the owner of a garage converted beauty parlor, jokingly says she’s built her business on one philosophy: “There is no such thing as natural beauty.” I guess that’s why one visit to a beauty parlor is not sufficient. We have to keep going back.

The foundation for this way of thinking probably starts when we first read fairy tales. We have Cinderella who isn’t even noticed until she gets her extreme makeover. The Ugly Duckling is looked down upon until becoming a swan. Sleeping Beauty and Snow White are filled with beauty references. “Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?” Certainly not me! Personally I was thankful for the movie Shriek. It gave me some sort of hope. Finally the overweight, dumpy girl was the princess.

As we get older and get set up on blind dates we never ask if the person is well groomed, nice, interesting, intelligent, or has a sense of humor, which are all qualities people say they are looking for in a mate. We want to know what the person looks like. Men forget that the makeup will eventually have to come off and women are more interested in abs than abilities.

Now don’t get me wrong. There is nothing wrong with being pretty, wearing designer jeans, and getting your nails done. I personally would rather have a professional haircut instead of whacking it off myself. However, we can learn a lot about looking at others from God’s perspective. 1 Peter 3:3-4 tells us God is more concerned about what’s inside a person than what is on the outside. Inner beauty will not fade. Inner beauty will never age or go out of style. Inner beauty is timeless.

Proverbs 31:30 tells us charm is deceptive and beauty fleeting. Halle Berry, considered one of the most beautiful women in the world, said, “Beauty? Let me tell you something, being thought of as ‘a beautiful woman’ has spared me nothing in life, no heartache, no trouble. Love has been difficult. Beauty is essentially meaningless, and it is always transitory.”

God and man do not view beauty or people the same way. God sees beyond the surface. Such was the case when Jesus walked this earth with his disciples. The disciples looked and saw a beggar, a tax collector, a blind man, a leper, a Gentile, or a woman. Jesus looked and saw people of value – beautiful children of God. At a time when lepers were not to be touched, Jesus touched them. At a time when tax collectors were shunned, Jesus ate with them. At a time when women were to be seen and not heard, Jesus spoke to them. Jesus looked beyond the surface – and so should we.

When the famous actress Audrey Hepburn was asked for beauty tips here are some she gave…

• For attractive lips, speak words of kindness.
• For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people.
• For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry.
• For beautiful hair, let a child run his or her fingers through it once a day.
• For poise, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone.
• The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries or the way she combs her hair.
• The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides.
• The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mode but the true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she lovingly gives the passion that she shows. The beauty of a woman grows with the passing years.

All in all, I think that’s great advice for anyone who truly wants to be beautiful. God would be pleased with this kind of beauty because it is not skin deep.